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Question

My boyfriend has a “best friend” who is a female and they supposedly love each other as friends only, however, I can tell at the very least its more than that from her.

I have tried to just ask that he will maintain boundaries with her, and have trusted him to do so over the last 2 years, but it only seems to be getting worse. Just recently he bought her a sex toy for her birthday and deliberately concealed that because he said “he knew I would trip” in addition to requesting pictures from her and continuously exchanging i love you, i miss you, and asking about each other’s days.

I personally think that their relationship is beyond whats appropriate interaction between “just friends” when you are in a relationship. He says I am just having a problem with all this because I don’t like her for whatever reason. I told him that I would like for him to cut ties with her … at least for a while and he refuses to do so.

At this point I don’t feel like I can be happy knowing that this other woman is out there having a relationship with the man who’s supposed to be in a committed relationship with me … am I going crazy or am I justified for feeling this way?

 

Answer

Any relationship that makes you uncomfortable should be handled by your lover. If he loves you, he would “modify” that relationship so that you can be comfortable with it. Personally, I think any sexual play or gift giving is definitely stepping over the line. If they were truly just friends, she would go out of her way to make you comfortable with her and she would even check him if he was being inappropriate. Clearly there is more than a friendship going on in my opinion. Keep your eyes open.

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