Super Bowl XLV ads didn’t blow anybody out Sunday night…
FIVE BEST
1. “House,” House ad. The network that carries the Supe gets to plug its own shows and Fox outdid itself by having Dr. Gregory House (Hugh Laurie) pull off a deliciously twisted parody of the famous Mean Joe Greene Coca-Cola ad. This one ends up with the kid crying.
2. Audi, Escape to Luxury. A whole screwball prison escape drama in 60 seconds. “Unleash the hounds,” barks the boss man, and elegant Afghans bound out. It ends with Kenny G. Who could have known?
3. Bridgestone Tires, Beaver. Okay, it wasn’t exciting like seeing Roseanne get flattened by a mammoth tree trunk. A guy avoids hitting a beaver because he’s driving on Bridgestone tires. The beaver pays him back six months later by felling a tree that keeps the guy from driving onto a collapsed bridge. It’s pure harmony between man and rodent. And it’s okay to cry.
4. PepsiMax, What they’re really thinking. There were two first-date spots and this was the best one. She’s wondering how he feels about commitment and kids and he’s obsessed about sleeping with her, until he gets obsessed about Pepsi. She says “No way” and he doesn’t know which obsession she’s addressing.
5. Adrien Brody, Stella Artois. A love song to a beer. It was the kind of thing the Budweiser lizards used to do when they were alive.
FIVE WORST
1. Doritos, Finger-lickin’ good. A guy licks the fingers of someone who has just finished a bag of Doritos, to get the cheese residue. Maybe the creepiest spot in Super Bowl history.
2. Teleflora, Valentine’s Message. The night’s toughest call, to be honest, since it’s so beautifully executed and the punchline would work perfectly in the mouth of, say, Bart Simpson. Downside: It played like a mean joke on 20 or 30 million Hill fans and everyone who had to explain it to the kids.
3. Motorola, Xoom. The monk hoods and the clever allusions to the Apple “1984” spot doubtless scored major props inside the tech world. To viewers, it brought back the good old days when we had no idea what dot.com ads were even trying to say.
4. Homeaway.com. Here again, it wasn’t exactly clear what was being promoted. But it was a nice clear image of a baby getting splatted face-first against a pane of glass.
5. Careerbuilders.com. Time for the monkeys to join the Bud lizards at the Old Super Bowl Ad Animals Retirement Home.
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